Random thoughts on Forgiveness

Forgiveness is something I struggle with at times. Times like now. Most sermons I hear on forgiveness tend to be the “forgive everyone, don’t let your pride get in the way of the Lord’s will” and I dont want to sound boastful, but thats really not the problem I have with forgiveness.

I have a hard time with it because I have a hard time knowing what it looks like.

On the surface (and in the depths), its the ability to admit that someone wronged you, and the ability to not hold it against them, to be able love them in spite of the past.

Okay, easy enough. Someone makes an inappropriate comment about my heritage. It hurt, but it was a slip of the lounge. I forgive them, and its forgotten within 36 hours. Next!

The tough ones are where the transgression was more personal, and im driven in one of two directions.

The first case: I had a teacher verbally abuse me in 10th grade, call me names, accuse me of things with no evidence, and then she had the moxie to “forgive” me for this “transgression” but only because she had to because her brother was “guilty” of it as well. (I cheerlead (past tense), just FYI). As you can tell there is still a little bit bitter about it. Afterwards, i did not report her, i still did work for her class. I did not plan a coups within her class. I just wanted to never have unnecessary contact with her again. Was my attitude of not having revenge enough to constitute “forgiving”, even with the lingering bitterness. Is my lack of desire to show love to this teacher a sign that i have not “forgiven” her in my heart?

Case Two: I was in a harmful relationship this past year. This person kept wronging me, and I kept forgiving them and forgetting – forgetting as in I let the transgression continue to occur. In this case I dont think there was genuine repentance on the other persons part. This for sure is not a true form of forgiveness, its a true form of stupidity.

But how does one walk that line. How does one stand up and say “I do not forgive you because your not really repenting” and do it with a pure heart, and do it lovingly? And not do it with respite or hatred or revenge? How do we remember the wrongs that people have committed against us in a neutral manor?

How does God?

+Alex Resurgent

Reflection on Sunday’s Reading (6 Ordinary A)

The Fifth Chapter of the Epistle to the Romans (NKJV)

1 Therefore, having been justified by faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ, 2 through whom also we have access by faith into this grace in which we stand, and rejoice in hope of the glory of God. 3 And not only that, but we also glory in tribulations, knowing that tribulation produces perseverance; 4 and perseverance, character; and character, hope. 5 Now hope does not disappoint, because the love of God has been poured out in our hearts by the Holy Spirit who was given to us.

6 For when we were still without strength, in due time Christ died for the ungodly. 7 For scarcely for a righteous man will one die; yet perhaps for a good man someone would even dare to die. 8 But God demonstrates His own love toward us, in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us. 9 Much more then, having now been justified by His blood, we shall be saved from wrath through Him. 10 For if when we were enemies we were reconciled to God through the death of His Son, much more, having been reconciled, we shall be saved by His life. 11 And not only that, but we also rejoice in God through our Lord Jesus Christ, through whom we have now received the reconciliation.

I read this passage sunday during service (theres something impressive to be said about a church that allows visitors to read the epistle on their first visit, but that is another post) and something about it struck a cord. Understandably, the Priest choose to pay his primary attention to the Gospel lesson, so I would like to spend a moment looking at this.

The first two verses address, what I would consider to be, the first tenant of our faith, that through Christ we have union with the Father. Through Christ we are able to rejoice in the Father, uninhibited by our unworthiness. Verse Five says that God pours out the Holy Spirit into us, which brings us into an even more perfect union with God, and from that stems hope. Hope which further prefects our faith.

The second section of the reading is the second tenant of our faith, that Christ died for us, reconciling us to God the Father. Fairly straight forward (I feel guilty saying that)

But what strikes me interesting is order the Paul uses. Traditionally the narrative is: we are sinners, but through the cross and resurrection we have the ability to have union with God. Whereas Paul’s narrative is that we currently have union with God, thanks to the crucification. Union is not something to be obtained, it is something that currently is.

Not to down play the crucification at all, it is something for which Christ ought be praised for for all eternity, but I suggest that we start looking at this post-crucifiction world view more often. I suggest that we spend more time abiding in Gods Spirit, rather than beating ourselves senseless with the fact that we didnt deserve the cross, and trying to justify it. We can never do that.

Instead let us carry out our mission of peace and love, knowing that we are in God, and that he is in us.

+A. Resurgent